today started bitter for me. my best friend called off our friendship on the base of some stupid misunderstanding. the funny thing is that i didn’t fight for it. it’s not like i lose best friends as a hobby but it’s happened a few times before that i begin to doubt the word “best”. there are friends, sure, just none are best. i did make a death pact with him. i die he dies, and vice versa. today we forsake that pact. i will die alone.
nonetheless it still made me feel ungrounded. i somewhat felt detached from reality and my mind went through a series of past hurts. then i remember my ex lie mei and turns out it’s her birthday today. what a fucked up coincidence. i even asked vie if it’s ok to call her but i killed that idea. instead i went to the mall with vie and watched 28 weeks later alone while vie hung out with her childhood friend. the movie kinda sucked but it was good watching a movie alone again after so long.
i’m still feeling shitty and i’m tempted to dig in my past to find something to hold on to. but i’ve somehow swallowed this retarded emotion. people will always disappoint you. it’s your choice whether to let them or not.
on the brighter side of today, i’m 99% done with the redesign. i was going to release it today but vie convinced me to wait until my birthday. i guess it’s not a bad idea. i never really treated myself anything for getting old. i guess it won’t hurt so bad. lol. but honestly i think there’s still something missing. that 1% that makes it perfect. the keystone. the completing pixel. or whatever.
the day is done. i hope tomorrow will be better.
{ 5 comments… read them below or add one }
I love you baby and whatever happens, we’ll always stick together
let’s have fun at bandung tomorrow, we deserve it. xoxo
thx baby. get some sleep and i’ll see you tomorrow.
Oh yeah ill see you guys tomorrow too we gonna have some fun in bandung
* just kidding*
You & your bud will possibly be buds again. Time calms us down.
pat pat pat…hugs hugs… tell me tomorrow ya
There are two sides to every story. Disappointment is a matter of opinion.