Mexico
Last night I pulled off something rather disturbing. Almost anyway. I designed my own death. I had told everyone [maybe not everyone] that I was moving to Tijuana, Mexico, and that I was going dark valid immediately. I had already phoned a friend to crash my bike and make it look like I died in an accident. I got my passport stamped, etc.
Sometime around early morning I realized I would hurt those I love, that it probably wasn’t worth all the thrill after all. I made a split-second decision and called it off.
Who am I? I guess I just don’t know anymore. If I’m what my ID card or my passport says then there’s not much to the person I am. I’m just statistics, stuck in a human body, when the fact is I’m immortal, worship me!!
That was a joke!
Ok there’s these two girls, whom I told, and I think I hurt them. They didn’t take my departure too well and now that I told them it was bogus they seem to hate me. I’m guessing somewhere between the emotions they somewhat love me. That’s enough to make me dandy for an after hour! 
Back to my nightly routines of misery.. still waiting for my partner to wire me some dough so I can actually have a “life” down here.
Update: This one girl thought I was talking about her. Whoever she is I think she hates me too now.. I’m down to three.. anyone else? 
November 12th, 2004 at 7:13am
Hey, you and Transience would make a good couple. She’s got a collossal ego and you’re about to do yourself in! You could do with a little of what each has.
November 12th, 2004 at 9:50am
Things don’t really change, they just move on. Rather than asking, “How is life treating you?” try, “How are you treating life?”
November 12th, 2004 at 10:23am
hmm…weird guy -_-”’ thats all i gotta say now…
November 12th, 2004 at 10:26am
Thanks Stan I’m not sure she’s interested though!
November 12th, 2004 at 11:13am
……
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..
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November 12th, 2004 at 12:09pm
Would you let me in on how to decrypt that, Brandon?
November 12th, 2004 at 12:15pm
hi, stan. i think JErm is a sweet guy.
and JErm, you shoudn’t joke about doing yourself in. i’d be losing a blog friend!!! (ok, that was selfish. blame it on my colossal ego, hehe.)
November 12th, 2004 at 12:30pm
I’m sweet? Have you licked me?
I wasn’t about to pull off the real thing, I was going to fake it so I can disappear and start a new life.. maybe as a “Gerald” eh Stan?
November 12th, 2004 at 12:49pm
i’d love to disappear from my old life. at least for a few days.
November 12th, 2004 at 1:27pm
Which old life? The one from the past or the one you’re living in atm? I really want to start over with a clean slate, but I hate the idea of reincarnation cuz I might end up a cockroach! Unless of course.. you’d tag along and be my cockroach goddess!
November 12th, 2004 at 1:58pm
this life. it’s as old as the milky way.
i’m sure i don’t want to be a cockroach, though. they’ll survive the nuclear war. that’s not poetic. i’m doomed, remember? =)
November 12th, 2004 at 2:15pm
A doomed goddess and a lone vampire.. I’m starting to think about what Stan said.. hmmmm…
November 12th, 2004 at 3:10pm
don’t think too hard.
November 12th, 2004 at 4:30pm
Don’t worry I’m not worthy!
November 12th, 2004 at 5:26pm
ah, what makes us worthy or not. that is the question. hehe.
nice talking to you, JErm! i’m heading home. i’m exhausted. you take care.
November 12th, 2004 at 8:10pm
Yeah same here.. this might work better on IM tho!
Ok have a nice ride home and get some rest.. talk to you another day! 
November 12th, 2004 at 10:28pm
Don’t flatter youself! “I’m guessing somewhere between the emotions they somewhat love me. That’s enough to make me dandy for an after hour!”—-Get over urself! *rolls eyes*
November 12th, 2004 at 10:42pm
If you are who you are I should say exactly the same.. cuz you weren’t one of them!!
November 12th, 2004 at 11:11pm
what made you think that I thought you were talking about me? I was saying that for the sake of the girls whom you were referring to…goodness! *rolls eyes*—again!
November 13th, 2004 at 11:34am
It’s hard not to be judgemental about some people, isn’t it, JErm?
November 13th, 2004 at 1:23pm
Humans.. I don’t have time for their baby-cries!!